DeEp InTo MaH FrEaKiN LyF

Sunday, December 26, 2004

I'm So sEnSeLeSs! I So Hate MySeLf..

here i go again, trying to somehow lessen the sadness and worriness im feeling right now. it's so amazing how someone can be so happy and then all of a sudden, he / she will turn all sorry and sad. that's exactly i am feeling right now. hours ago i was with my family sharing some fun times on a mall, and then here i am, not alone, but still feel so empty and sad. i dunno why. i really dunno. maybe, because of all the problems that i have right now..maybe because of the surrounding..or maybe, i'm just really a hopeless case of a lost i wish i cud just turn back tym and un-do all the stupid things that i've done....and re-think again all the bad and dumb thoughts i had before...and un-break the hearts that ive hurt before.....oh how i wud love to really turn back tym..anyways, it's impossible so i'll just erase that crazy thought...all i have to do, is live my life, face my responsibilities, enjoy all the things that i have right now, and love the people who are sharing their tym with me........hahaha...see how quickly i changed my perspective?hehehe....i'm really such a dumbass....ahehehe..maybe i'm from mars....or from the moon...doesn't matter

Monday, December 20, 2004

DiS iS iNsAnE! Agh..

It's almost 1:30am and me and cyron still dont know where to go. We are stranded, lacking money and directionless (if there's such a word). And this is because of my overflowing urge to attend my clan's Xmas Party at Malate. I attended the party, and dissed out my Office's xmas party and i even did not go to work. Well, u can't blame me..i just wanna be with my friends and especially with my significant other--my ever lovable and sometimes crazy BF,Cyron...anyways, we had a blast and we partied all night long..and after the EB, me and cyron was able to spent some quality time together...we just didnt know the sufferings after that...and here we are, suffering from all the crazy and selfish things that we did...but anyway, we're still what the hell do i care? hahahaha......just kiddin....of course i care about other things, i'm just so busy being happy at that moment......blame me, but that wont have any effect on me....crazy, aight? hehe....

Sunday, December 12, 2004

I'm WiTh my oThEr HaLf! so God damn 4m today we left zambales and i had to endure a 5 hour trip by van and we're so just so thankful im with very cool people and i love them so much..i feel so welcome when im with them..there are really a lot of things i should be happy about...and right now, im with my boyfriend, Cyron, on an internet cafe in Shangrila just to pass some tym coz i still dont feel like going to work...i feel so good just to be with him..but im so freaking pissed off right now!...u know why? well, it's jsut that while im making this post he is freaking busy chatting with a lot of gurls...the nerve! ahehe.....but it's ok with me...i have an itsy bitsy trust with him anyway...and i know he loves me....and it's just harmless chat right? and my negative mind...amm..what else? gosh, i dunno what to say to my uncle when i go home later this morning...i hope he's not mad at me...anyway, im so happy at last i have an online journal! Yippeee!!!! such a freak...neweiz, gotta holla now....time's up! See ya next tym...